Don't wait for the right time to come, but make it the right time because the right time may never come around
If Not Now Then When
wwtd? what would terripham do?
it's a new way of life
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Passion is the most power force on earth
The most powerful weapon on earth is the human soul on fire.
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Good deeds and Kind Words
"Kind words can be short and easy to speak, but their echoes are truly endless" -Mother Teresa
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How To Breakup With Anyone
Breaking up is by far the HARDEST thing to do… especially when its an ok relationship or when the person is genuinely a good person.
Whatever the reason is, here are some tips to keep in mind!
Don’t Flatter
I admit: I have looked directly into a guy’s eyes and said, “This is just the realest thing I’ve felt for anybody and it scares me to death.” I mean, holy God, is this effective…temporarily. As elegant an exit strategy as “leather jacket loner who’s afraid to love” is, this does not a clean break make. I mean, not unless you literally drive off in your Thunderbird, crushing your smartphone under the wheel in the process. You’re saying, “I am desperate to be away from you permanently, but I am open to having sex before that happens” but they’re hearing “Better double up on those prenatal vitamins!” This is the Wrong Way to Lie #1.
Don’t Be Cruel
While you shouldn’t be flat-out dishonest, this isn’t a futuristic utopia where people wipe with seashells and childlike frankness rules the day. If you aren’t attracted to her or the sex is awful or you wish for death whenever she pronounces “disapora” incorrectly, she doesn’t need to know that. These are all things that can be distilled into satisfying generalities. Telling her that you’re “in different places” is so much better than saying, “I feel like I’m putting my penis in one of those Alpine ice mummies.” Because it’s partially true: You’re “in a place” where you want to enjoy sex, and she’s “in a place” where she wants to lie perfectly still with her eyes squeezed shut like every time is an arranged marriage wedding night. If the whole truth is too ugly, it’s okay to bolster the partial truth with an honest cop-out.
Don’t Act Like It’s a Favor
If you want to do something altruistic, go to a filthy beach and find an oily otter. Gently scrub him with Dawn, remove the six-pack ring caught around his little leg, then watch him gambol joyously back into the wild when you release him on a clear spring morn. Don’t do this to women. We are not industrial cleanup sites! (I mean, I am, but most of us aren’t.) Don’t lie to us so it seems like you’re setting us free. If for no other reason than it’s a bad fib: you don’t think we’re amazing! If you really think somebody is amazing, you don’t break up with her. This means no, “Someday you’re going to meet somebody who loves you the way you deserve to be loved” or “You’re so great and you should be with somebody who isn’t so screwed up.” Save it for the otters, Jayson Blair.
Don’t Have One Foot Out the Door or Deep Inside Another Person
I used to think that a good way to prep somebody for imminent dumpage was to act like I was already single. Not cheating, per se (okay, sometimes cheating), but making plans for weekend and couple holidays without regard to what they were doing, and just kind of not “showing up” any more. It’s a cowardly way to tip someone off that you don’t want to date them anymore, and it just sort of makes them slowly hate you. It’s an iteration of deceit. It also cements your place as “The Asshole” with mutual acquaintances and with Judge Judy, who you definitely want in your corner when she’s divvying up the custom car detailing business you started together, back when you were still in love. “Your honor, he has been neglecting me for months, leaving me to run Shorty Got Low(Riders) LLC all alone.” “That sonafabitch! I grant you court expenses and all remaining whistle tips.”
Don’t Be a High School English Teacher
For some reason, some people like the longggggggggg method of breaking up. You know, with multiple lengthy conversations and the dreaded seven-page follow up email. ABRIDGE! Too much honesty is the worst. This means no epic summary of why things weren’t working and where you went wrong. This is not time to be Daniel Stern, wrapping things up with takeaway narration. If it was, we would be laughing through our tears instead of burning cigarette holes in photographs of your eyes. And if you send an email quoting ANYTHING—“The Second Coming” or Barthes or God help you Bob Dylan—you have cemented your place in the pantheon of Awful Ex-Boyfriends. I’m not a legal expert (just a really huge Judge Judy fan!) but if you write a breakup letter I’m pretty sure the recipient is allowed sneak into your house when you’re asleep and shoot roman candles at you.
Don’t Be Too Nice
It sounds counterintuitive, but there’s a time when you really do have to shut it down. Breakups suck, and even the nicest, most stable woman can turn into that crazy white girl who tried to steal Beyoncé‘s husband in Obsessed. Remember, a rocket can’t soar until the burnt out boosters disengage! (Go ahead and use that, it’s on me.) If you’ve broken up with her kindly and sincerely, and she still insists on acting all nutty and dragging things out, tell her as nicely as you possibly can that the conversation ceased to be productive. There’s a point where kindness is just sublimated guilt.
Maybe it’s wrong to tell you to fudge the truth, even in the interest of protecting somebody you care about. Somebody who really is better off without you will get over “The Truth” eventually. But somebody who really is happier with you… Well, she’ll never really be less hurt by knowing exactly why you just don’t feel the same way. The truth is, I don’t think there is a “humane” way to break up with someone who really loves you, except to hold her hand when she’s old and infirm, long after years of affectionate marriage have forged a deeper, more complex and perhaps more enduring kind of love, and then wait a respectful period after her death before hitting the clubs.
(http://www.gq.com/news-politics/mens-lives/201111/how-to-break-up-with-girlfriend#ixzz1noppBcN5)
